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Sunday, August 16, 2009

Laughable quotes

Ve have veys of making you laugh.


I nearly missed this. Sorry, Nazri you ain't the comedian of the day this time. That title goes to Shukri Ahmad, the investigation chief of the MACC. Shukri announced that the MACC will stop investigating politicians indefinitely! Why? Because he is fed-up. Why? He feels that he and his men were being "slammed" no matter what they did. He said public scorn was another reason. "I am frustrated. We will stop probing all politicians, across the political divide, indefinitely. I am dead serious about this," he said.

Now, this is the laughable bit...

"We have been giving it our all, working seven days a week, even during Hari Raya, but the manipulations have affected us so badly that my officers and I just cannot go on like this," Shukri lamented. poor thing ah?

This must be the first time that a public servant has made a declaration like this. Talk about breaking Malaysian records man!

In the Star today there were a number of quite laughable quotes. I thought I'd share them with you.

"Of late, the opposition parties are creating all sorts of race-based issues and Umno will not compromise in this matter".........Deputy Prime Minister, Muhyiddin Yassin.

"All parties must refrain from touching on issues concerning the royalty, religion and race during the campaigning period for the Permatang Pasir by-election".........Minister of Home Affairs, Hishamuddin Hussein

"The Selangor government’s failure to gazette Little India here as a tourist spot has negated the Federal Government’s efforts to promote the area and fails to recognise Indian traders' contributions to the economy".....Tourism Minister, Ng Yen Yen.

Only in Malaysia!

Oh, oh could I have forgotten about our consummate cabinet comedian, Nazri Abdul Aziz. But as usual his stand-up routine is much too funny and deserves more than the few sentences that I am prepared to type on the day of rest. So you can go and read it yourself here. Enjoy!


P/S To anybody who is not Malaysian the above probably means squat. Naer mine la. Thanks for visiting anyway.


Anonymous said...

race-based issues are stirred up by calling other Malays "traitors" based on their own feelings and dislike. Backward politics... but sadly it works in Malaysia.

Hidup BN!
Hidup UMNO!

Ayahanda Ananda said...

Dey Mr/Mrs Minister;

(from dialogue from Stephen Chow:)

"Ye lah long yi ko, sao-Pei lah!!!"
"夜啦, 龙二哥, 收皮啦"
Translate: It is already late, shut up and go home!

komando said...

Niamah kah fu lat

This stupid DPM "mah yu ting" sudah "fat yan ting" very soon "fat sun king".

He started it and he now panicked!



Anonymous said...

Oh! now he say cannot talk lah. All the while they not only tok but tokkok. Now suddenly cannot tok. "All parties must refrain from touching on issues concerning the royalty, religion and race during the campaigning period for the Permatang Pasir by-election".........Mnister of Hom Afair, Krisshamuddin Hussei.. No election can talk lah! Smart guy, uh. If PR talk about these issues people will know the truth. The truth will make BN loose the by-election. Ahah! he forgot to mention 'mongoli.......' girl, no black T-Shirt.etc. blah! blah! blah!. Zzzzzz.Zzzzzzzz.

Anonymous said...

Pity this guy, shukri, maybe he is saying that he want a gaji buta, no work mah! Suddenly don't want to investigate politicians. What a joke.Don't you all see. The tiong guy and the otk guy need to be investigated. So these RM10 Million guys might go free. Don.t want to investigate mah!. Fed-up? silly excuses. Maybe the tiong guy also buy insurance with him too. So if he is been investigated, another RM10 million scandal be bongkar.Maybe he also use private jet. Wake up shukri, if u want to stop investigation of politician, than u better resign. Politician are the most corrupted. We are just saying that you must investigate politicians from PR and also from BN fairly and without fear or favour. Like that also don't know ah!

Anonymous said...

Since the internet filter plan was scraped, now there is an 'election ceramah gag plan' Cannot talk this cannot talk that. Than talk what. Can carry kris or not. Now we all will have a 'wayang kulit without the music election ceramah'. Cannot tok mah! I better don't tokkok also, otherwise the smart minister will also ban all ceramahs. Ve are relly laughing.

Anonymous said...

Ng Yeang Yeang. Yeang chi leh ah!(Trying to endure you). You are the Tourim Minister, don't blame others. Just do you job well.

Anonymous said...

That's why it is imperative to spread the word and reminders to all Msians NOT to read MSM especially NST,Star,MM,Utusan,Berita Harian.

Anonymous said...

Try google Nazri womanizer and see what you will find.

michael said...

Ok .. More laughable quotes today.

1. MCA treasurer general Tee Hock Seng said there was NO SIGN of the RM 10 million allegedly donated by Tiong for party coffers (Money simply vanished?)

2. No politician is above the law - says Muhyiddin.

3. Works ministers asking toll operators to give discounts during festivals to compensate for the congestion.

4. The MACC should not run away from its responsibility to curb corruption but work with the opposition and BN to curb corruption - Hishammudin.

5. MACC officers never pushed Ong until he fell (They did not deny pushing Ong, but not until he fell)

Anonymous said...

I think you missed the funniest quote for the day lah. It's in the NST. Rais Yatim tells the Mat Rempits to take up singing !!! In the article he says these Mats should channel their energies into something more useful-lah. Then he says apparently RTM got this People's Cultural Square programme and these Mats can try going there to sing.
I guess our ministers must think that these Mats are quite pitiful ppl who are so talented but don't know how else to spend their energies. Earlier on the Malacca CM suggested these Mats take up flying small planes or something like that, right ? Now it's singing. Haha. What will they think of next. So sympathetic towards a public menace.....

Anonymous said...

No difference from our Polis who had chosen not fight crime because people had been complaining about it.

Malaysia Boleh

Anonymous said...

Wow, this S/A so powerful one, up to him to say whether to go ahead or not with the investigation one, izzit? Is he on pubic's tax payroll or he's generating his own income?Scared of politicians 'cos they can talk to media, right? How about those commoner? Interrogate cum physical exercise to your heart content izzit?

bennyloh said...


Samuel Goh Kim Eng said...


It's fun to use useless politicians' quotes
But watch out for those who become turncoats
Even in the same boat they still rock all the boats
To find out who will finally sink or barely float

(C) Samuel Goh Kim Eng - 170809
Mon. 17th Aug. 2009.

Anonymous said...

Sook Kee Li ah how can you say like that? Just because Ah Tiong Ko wag those who ever opens his or her mouth you also kecut already. Don't worry lah brother now is the time to show the public that you meant business and do your duty without fear or favour. Like that ma. Or are you worried that he will also exposed your dealings, all the bn politician will also be exposed.

What sort of department is this? Ok boys let start going after PR only...oh bigger case coming out this time involving bigger bosses from bee end. Ok I will give the order to stop investigation of ALLLLLLLLL POLITICIAN. Why announce stop when the BN are involved. Double A standard.

Anonymous said...

RACE issue ah ? ok : 9.58s/100m !!

Anonymous said...

Ya lo, this Lice Yatim, macam macam ada. I was watching the TV before the 8th of march. The opposition were talking of current issues etc while the BN women section went round kampong teaching kg folks about line dancing and whatever traditional dance. To them no serious issue just eat good, sing sleep and be happy.

Today's news report by PR's youth against DPM for corruption etc.. don't worry brother I am waiting for them to bill me also what. But don't ask me who gives the green light to use hell li copter, when was the approval on what ground. That one kemudianlah. Now I am waiting for the official bill too. I am joining Ong Ticket.

Anonymous said...

MACC, don't want to work? FUCK OFF THEN!