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Thursday, August 19, 2010

Free sex days

Nasrudin Hassan, PAS Youth Chief.
Free sex available during New Year celebrations.


Hi, this is Patrick Teoh. I am constantly amazed at the problem solving abilities of Malaysian politicians. It doesn't matter if the issues are global warming, nuclear disarmament or just plain old SEX the YB's can come up with solutions just like that.

The latest example of this incredible and uniquely Malaysian talent is shown by the PAS Youth Chief, Nasrudin Hassan. He has just announced that the recent spate of baby dumping is caused by, among other decadent Western influences, Valentine's Day and New Year celebrations. He said these occasions encouraged liberal socialising and free sex, which resulted in the act of dumping babies. Oh really? Shit! And I have been staying home during New Year's Eve celebrations all these years? Fuck! If I knew there was so much free sex going round I might have been tempted to go out and get some as well. I wonder where he got the information from? Eh Nas, can share a bit ah? Never mind the liberal socialising bit I just want to know where the free sex is. Nasrudin also said that there were a high number of cases of couples caught for khalwat (close proximity) recorded during carnivals including the Merdeka Day celebrations. Fuck! That's another celebration that I should have joined in instead of watching it on TV.

Nasrudin claims that because there is a spike in baby dumping cases between July and September each year it must be an indication that the ‘mating season’ occurred during the New Year celebrations. Mating season?
That's what he thinks of us. We're just a bunch of fucking animals. Mating season!

And as usual Nasrudin blames the West for all this. He said that Valentine's Day and New Year celebrations originated from the West, did not “sit well with our country’s traditions.” They are of western origin and therefore does not sit well with our country's traidtions? Then what about computers, television, McDonald's, Coca Cola, trousers, air-conditioning, motorcars or Kap Cai's for that matter. Or do you think that the kap cai is a Japanese invention and is therefore okay?

But to be fair to the Nasrudin fler he did say something sensible at the end of it. He said that we must review the education system to teach youths how to apply their knowledge of subjects like morality in everyday life, rather than merely feeding them information all day in schools.

Thank goodness you're not all bullshit, Nasrudin. There are still some working brain cells in that skull of yours.



Anonymous said...

where where where???

Anonymous said...

dimana mana mana !!??

Anonymous said...

Hell! Shit! I missed all the orgies out there. Promise myself will never stay home again whenever there is a New Year or Valentine celebration. Uncle Pat ah, next time we can form a group to hunt for free sex out there. What say you.

Anonymous said...

I also want man.

Khun Pana aka johanssm said...

What wrong with FREE sex?
The AG bonks his subordinate , the DPP bonks the star witness , The star witness bonks the PM's aide , the president of mca bonks his mistress in full view of Malaysians and the World , Bung KinaBatangan bonks Zizie , The then DPM bonks his translator , his best friend bonks her too and Mohd Mohd bonks the daughter of a sultan.

Stop blaming Westerners and liberals for all the free bonking.

Anonymous said...

Aiya bro Pat

Tell that Nasty not to go fishing for a reason the simpleton way. The cause may be much more complex.

The 7 month gestation period in not human. Checking up Wikipedia I found some animals do have a gestation period of 7/12 like the aardvark or some deers. Could it be.......? Mr Nas has to check this out.

A logical answer could be found in a conversation I once had with a very renowned doctor. He told me the foreskin or prepuce might secrete a very potent sex inhibitory hormone. Once this is removed the individual's sex drive is boosted many fold ! Now, this sounds good ,doesn't it...... Viagra sales will drop now. Incidentally the prepuce also secrete many other hormones governing things like intelligence, abstract thought, logical thinking....etc etc. Just think of the enormous damage the removal causes.

As for the free sex, this again shows up the malaysian this and free that,15% housing discount,oil subsidy....and on, and on.... When will malaysians free themselves of these handouts. This is a beggar's
attitude. This does not mean I don't have this attitude, I am also after some free sex, so can this Nasty tell me where I can find some in his neighbourhood. I come from a pretty up-market one.

I can certainly see why things "western" don't sit well with him. Someone should tell him those goggles sitting on his nose don't do him much good aesthetically. They look like flowers on a donkey.

NnniiiaammaaahhhHHH KkkaauussaaaiiiaaiiiIIII

lynch_mob_x said...

i want free sex!!!!

Anonymous said...

If only they use condoms, all the issues will not be surfaced. Sharizat, what say you?

What about ali Rustam's suggestion for malays to get married early in order to enjoy legal sex?

Anonymous said...

how is it that oni a certain group making that much hoo-haa??
where's mic or mca on this?

Anonymous said...

"nas blame it on western culture"
the tendency to do evil is the same with everyone because we inherited it. the only difference is the westerners do it openly, the asian do it secretly and the arabs do it on the donkeys.the worst are those hiding it with religious piety.

Anonymous said...

The problem is that those religious preachers don't live their lives like usual ppl and didn't do much research and most importantly analyst. Well they could never qualified for TED talks. Pathetic.

Anonymous said...

You all missed the point and failed to argue critically. The clashes of paradigms. Unconsciously, most of you have been behaving based on a changing (to a certain extent corrupted) paradigm. Think critically of those words "unconsciously" and "changing (i.e corrupted) paradigm" and one will value and treasure more the traditional paradigm that one has all this while.

Anonymous said...

The skull cap must have suffocated the brain cells of Nasrudin fler. Seems like his remaining brain cells are honed in on free sex only.

Oi, Nasrudin, pray tell me where I can get free sex and I promise to wear double condoms and practice safe sex at the same time to prevent unwanted babies. I am fully available during this Merdeka day (24 hours) and on all other festive and celebratory days.

Anonymous said...

I always think sex education is one aspect to enlightening the younglings. But we all know a lot will not be able to contain themselves. So what's the next best thing? Use protection. Practice safe sex. That's what.

I think these people conveniently leave the above facts out. Or rather, they have taboo'ed the subject entirely till it makes their kids' curiosity peak. and that's never a good thing.


Anonymous said...

Buang bayi - This is a problem sharizat cannot even solve.

Caligula said...

Hi Patrick,
What Nash say is quite true, you know these celerbration like Valentine and Merdeka celebration. I am glad you brought out about coca cola, the favourite beverage during buka puasa.
You see ah Pat , after Buka puasa, those ladies buka sarong and you know la with a coke bottle, what they can do with it.

Anonymous said...

To Anonymous 11.05 am

What are you trying to say ? I honestly don't get your point and "changing paradigms".

You have failed me with your points and critical arguments and implied superiority. I don't think my English is sub-standard or Sekolah menengah kebangsaan std and my intellectual capacity has always been admired and never been questioned.

Perhaps writing in simple plain English without meaningless words would help your ideas, if any, to get across.

Full of shit. NNIiaammaahhHH

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh it true...

Pls list al the place d.. is damm itchy 2get free ride..huhu. If i would hv knwn earlier..i wouldnt get a house or hotel huhu.. jst wondering in street to get free riderzz.. tats cool man. I never seen KL City was in the list even thought its hype.... but LOOOK where it HAPPENZzzzz ...North ...opzzz im wearing n covering my full from top to bottom..opzzz i get rid of my child inside dust in...who the hack is doing tis YOU called religious GURU. then wt the heck u waatch ENGLISH Movies...n study eng as subjct in school you dumb ass... PLZ look who is doing tat OK. Come ON b a GUY n point it out who is doing al those raping n dumping inthis country which so called MALAY ---SIAN. opzzz others are pendatang yaaa...but we dont do this cheap things ..we use ConDo....mzzzz. haha protection maa... nt like you guys...raping grandmother ...etc ...I think we can document and produce a good film about INCEST in MALAYSIA ...wat u say...100% every1 agree

Anonymous said...

Isnt it good that politicians speak like that? I say the more the merrier. That way I know I am smarter than them. Open their gap to confirm their stupidity

Anonymous said...

Mmmm..this fler always has sex in his mind. Somehow he links sex to everything. My take is that:
1) Maybe he is not getting enough, and so he keeps fantasizing about having sex, or
2) He is bonking all the time, and thus scream sex each time anybody talks to him, or
3) Maybe he knows a lot about where all the orgies are, but he's not telling us where. He does not want to share the spoils.
But whatever...he is a disgrace to PAS, Pakatan and Malaysia. He should join UMNO where his heart is. Ooops...
Maybe he is an UMNO mole, and he is purposely saying a lot of nonsense to make a fool of PAS and Pakatan! PAS and Pakatan fellas better watch their backsides (no pun intended).

Anonymous said...

Bloody hell! 50 years of my live missing out on the 'celebrations' every each and damn year! Kenapa tak cakap awal-awal. Now my 'small head' is complaining!!!!!!! NUMBNUTS!

Homophobic said...

Hahaha.. I thought you were always out there during those celebrations, mingling with the young crowd, hoping to prowl on some young hotties.. But too bad, that they were never interested in ugly midgets like you!! Hahahaha.. and now trying to hide the fact that even Ugly Betty won't lick your dick by saying you were at home during those nights? Hahaha.. Old fart, you're so fucked up!

Anonymous said...

"Paradigm" in a layman language, among others, is a set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices that constitutes a way of viewing reality for the community that shares them, especially in an intellectual discipline (freedictionary).

"Changing" is an adjective describing the state the paradigm is undergoing in most of the commentators including your good self without, unfortunately, realizing it.

In other words, both parties are basing on different reference points. The differences need to be attended analytically and critically. Any comments or critics arisen should be done "very very" carefully.

Thus, as a result of failing to acknowledge these differences, any sound and sane mind (including your good self) can only find "***t"s (as you termed it)and its similar interspersed in the postings. No concrete objective knowledge can be acquired much less shared. The more one reads the writing the clearer the intellectual level capacities of the owner and some of the commentators become. It is a saddening trend for future leaders for this beloved land. The saddest thing is that it was done unconsciously. Let's hope it won't continue to be done once the consciousness is regained.

-Live responsibly and justly for a better Malaysia, world.

Anonymous said...

Kondom 1Malaysia will solve the baby dumping problem.

Afterall, we will support beli barangan Malaysia - malaysian latex.

Anonymous said...

To Anonymous 10.15 am

what are you trying to explain ? Your explanation has made what you originally wrote even more incomprehensible !

As usual you want everything free. Go and get a good dictionary and get a fuller understanding of "paradigm"

Perhaps you should expand on your explanation so that we , the non-village psychoanalysts can understand the concepts behind your very profound logic in your very critical arguments.

The saddest thing is not an action that was done unconsciously, which we can forgive, the saddest thing is an action that was done consciously and, may I add, deliberately. Examples come by the buckets in Malaysia like the burning of churches, the caning of women, the discrimination of non-bumis, the dumping of babies, the murder of TBH, the deliberate misinterpretation of the Koran and of course the mouthing of untrue or false statements especially by UMNOputras.

Commonsense and logical thinking is the same everywhere, irrespective whether you are a muslim, christian, Malay, Chinese or Indian. There is only one reference point, not two. So Mr Anon, perhaps you are a bit different and approve the death sentence for baby-dumpers ?

I only agree with your last statement, to live responsibly and justly for a better Malaysia. Can you tell that to the UMNOputras, the police and the judiciary ? Or can this statement be seen from 2 different angles ?

Shit, NniiaammaahhH.

Anonymous said...

Patrick, i think you put too much words into other people's mouth. In this case, Nasrudin's.

On free sex,
Nasrudin's words - Free sex = freedom in extra-marital sex,
Patrick's interpretation - Free sex = sex without payment i.e. money (literally translated)

On things of western origin,
Nasrudin's - western celebrations e.g. new year's eve, valentine.
Patrick's interpretation - everything from the west, includes coke, air-cond, tv (extrapolation)

The problem is, your readers simply take your words as Nasrudin's. They then condemn his views. And that is definitely not fair.

p/s: please don't censor this comment.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous 1.26 pm

I don't know if we speak the same English. When I read free sex, it is sex without payment, it is not confined to free extra-marital sex only. It means sex between 2 consenting people,not sex with a prostitute.

We should perhaps get a copy of the speech then we will know whether Pat is wrong to extrapolate, but from the short note you have written I might not agree with you.

Anonymous said...

i think it is time to introduce "1MalaysiaCondom" campaign to the public.

AMM said...

ust nasrudin hassan is talking about the muslims..not the non muslims

u r fuckin retarded!!!

Anonymous said...

AMM 8.09pm

Aha , Mr/Ms AMM, you have pissed against the wind which is not a very clever thing to do.

Regardless of whether Mr Nas is talking about muslims or non-muslims ,his reasoning is faulty. OK ? So who is retarded, Mr Nas or you or both !!

NNIIiiaammaahhHH Boleh