(Sob, sob, sob) Please lah. Respect sikit.
Have you noticed that of late there has been a lot of talk about "respect"? The police flers are asking for respect. The YB's constantly demand of us respect for this, that and the other. And now the DPM has said that PKR's Azmin Ali was being disrespectful to Mahathir when the former referred to the ex-PM as a 'fallen leader'. The DPM said that the action was 'contradictory to our values...'. What I don't understand is, what the fuck are our values these days? Perhaps if the DPM would explain that to us first before demanding respect for this, that and the other we might be more receptive. I mean, at the rate that respect is demanded of us Malaysians we might as well wear a collar round our necks, a serial number on our foreheads and replace the Indonesians on construction sites for no pay! You know what I mean? One day we might even be building pyramids to house the remains of the people that we "respect". Oh what the hell! Let's go all the way lah. Call Malaysian prime ministers Pharoahs instead. Then it will be RESPECT or else! Errr......isn't it like that already? Hmmm....
Another funny from the MSM is the announcement from Muhyiddin when he launched the 1Malaysia Milk programme in Kota Kinabalu. He said, "We want to see a future generation that is smarter, stronger and bigger." Huh? I thought that would require good schools an education system that works, sports and good nutrition. No ah? Oh I see....just drink 1Malaysia Milk issit? WAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! Damn good man! Then later in the same speech he said that Malaysia only produces 4% of the milk it needs while the rest is imported from New Zealand and other countries. What??? You mean our children are drinking milk from those decadent Western countries who don't subscribe to our VALUES ah? How can man? After that our children grow smarter, stronger and bigger and then don't respect us then how?
You must have read about the BTM fler who alledgedly uttered racist remarks at a Puteri Umno closed-door function. The fler, Hamim Husin supposedly used words like SiSepet and SiBotol to describe Malaysians of non-Malay origin. Cannot, right? Not nice, right? Well Perkasa said it was okay because Hamim's speech was in a closed-door event. That's right. HUH!!!??? Motor-mouth, Nazri said it was just remarks from an individual. Yeah! And that individual just happened to be the assistant director of the Biro Tata Negara. Anyway, my point was this. You would think that an incident like this would warrant quick investigation into the allegations of racism by a senior government officer, right? But apparrently, the fler Hamim has now lodged a police report against the online news portal that broke the story. Apparently, the reporter broke the law when he/she entered the closed-door event without permission. Laughable isn't it? Want to Tai Chi also do properly la. Maybe that's why the fler is only Assistant director. Hahahahahaha......
Okay, perhaps the funniest headline in a newspaper story, unless Najib or Muhyiddin or Hishammuddin come up with something before the end of the week, is the one in yesterday's Star page N14.
"I won't interfere in MIC affairs, says Samy Velu"
Funny, right? Many flers have used that sort of line before. Lee Kuan Yew, Mahathir and now good old Samy. Next may be Kim Jong Il when he hands over North Korea to his son.
And then ah, before we all become too harsh with Ng Yen Yen perhaps you might like to know that several countries are now seeking our help to develope their own tourism products. Who? Well, Laos is getting our "technical" help for Visit Laos Year 2012. And you thought making leaky roofs was a cinch. Ha! Who else? Brunei is also asking us for help with tourism development. And right away, being a person who knows tourism products like the back of her hand Yen Yen announced that Brunei has much to offer tourists with its beautiful mosques and museums. Chad and Sudan are queueing up for our pertolongan (help). Your apologies for doubting Yen Yen's talents may be sent through your local MCA branch. Thank you.
Are there ghosts haunting the site where cosmetics millionairess Sosilawati and others were murdered? This question was asked of our brave men in blue. The police la. "No!" was the reply from Dep Comm Khalid Abu Bakar. “No, I did not hear anything like that. In fact, I have gone to the location many times during the day and late at night. Never once did I or my men hear or see anything peculiar.”
Wah! Now the PDRM are ghost-busters too?
Here's an obscure but scary statement that is buried in page N27 of The Star today.
Assoc Prof. Dr. Rozmi Ismail, the head of the Perkasa Camp Centre for Youth Empowerment says, "Rempit is an unstoppable activity. We can only hope that the youngsters will become responsible once they have passed adolescence." Shit! That's not funny.