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Friday, September 20, 2013

Snippets as we near the weekend

Let's go now. They won't be looking for us.
Do we look like ash to you?

This is quite funny......

"All entry points into Malaysia (are) monitored and men alerted to prevent remains of Chin Peng to enter the country," - Inspector-General of Police, Malaysia.

No wonder, crime these days seem to be the preferred vocation for many. The police are too busy being on the alert for dead people.

Somebody suggested that Chin Peng's family should check out the Sulu route. Apparently, can come through that way into Malaysia quite easily.


Malaysia hopes to send more astronauts into space by 2016. Well, I guess it's good to know in advance where some of our GST money is going. I also read that when the first fler went into space in 2007 he carried out experiments including on cancer cells and leukemia. I am sure that we, who paid for his trip will get to know the results of those experiments. Eventually.


The tapering of the fuel subsidy by the government, which has resulted in a hike in fuel prices, will only have a minimal impact on the country's inflation, says Treasury Secretary-General Dr Mohd Irwan Serigar Abdullah.

 Really? I... am not an economist or accountant. All I know is that everything that my family needs to survive not cost a lot more than they used to. So why is my government still telling me that the rise in fuel prices will only have a minimal impact. Maybe the impact on paper is minimal but to us people on the street the impact is not minimal at all. Or is it?
So now a government-owned company is taking over the whole operation of the AES traffic/speeding policing system. The street edition of The Sun today carried a front-page quote about this from the Minister of Transport which is quite funny.

"Under my watch, nobody is going to profit from this" - Hishammuddin Hussein, Minister of Transport.

Hahahahaha...of course! Nobody! Else.
There's something about this that I don't quite understand......

“Right now, the GNI of Bumiputeras is RM56 million. So to achieve RM900 billion by 2020, the government must provide funds worth RM1.4 trillion to Bumiputeras” - Ibrahim Ali, Perkasa.
This one also quite confusecations......

"How many non-Malay conglomerates benefitted from government funds and contracts. We now only have one Malay tycoon. Is it wrong if we want two or three more?” - Ibrahim Ali, Perkasa.


Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Come for some laughs

The show starts next Tuesday, 24 September at the Petaling Jaya Live Arts centre (PJLA)
Buy your tickets now.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Some weekend Confuse-ments

Here are some things to confuse the hell out of your weekend............

“If that is government policy, why didn’t he stop it? Is he going to lie to the commission and claim that I ask him to do all these? He should know, he was my deputy" - Dr. Mahathir when questioned about Project IC.

I am a little confused....

If it is government policy how can anyone stop it? And if it is government policy how could the Prime Minister not have known about it? Can one ah?

 Anyone know?
I am confused by this subsidy thing also. Najib says Malaysians cannot continue to have the subsidy mentality and expect things to be subsidised. So he pulls back petrol subsidy and raises petrol price by 20 sen. Then almost with the same breath he promises that there is a possibility of increasing the amount of the 1Malaysia People’s Aid (BR1M) from the current RM500. That's subsidy too, right? No ah? Then how?
And finally, a piece to sweeten your weekend or otherwise. Hee hee hee..........
And who says Perkasa's Ibrahim Ali is stupid? The man is a genius. Read this. In one sweep he has

a) refuted all the YBs and scholars' claim some months ago that we were NEVER colonised.

"........since this country has been colonised b...
y the British for more than 400 years, the Malays have been subjected to all kinds of disadvantages such as suppression, deprivation, marginalisation, and even humiliation."

b) stated the BN government's modus operandi for the past 4 decades.

"This deliberate colonial policy was to ensure that they (the Malays) remain poor, backward, cornered, and doomed so that the British (ed. substitute any Malaysian political party name here also can one) can perpetuate their rule and colonisation for as long as they can."

There's more of course. Including blaming ...... the Chinese for the woes of everybody else...... it should be the Malays who should be shouting for better treatment ...... 65 per cent of the population be given just 30 per cent of the economic cake. Is this a fair division of the economic cake?

The "wisdom" of Ibrahim Ali. Read about it in The Malay Mail.





Thousand apologies

My sincere apologies. My fingers clicked too soon and I accidentally removed some comments that were pending moderation. So sorry.

Thursday, September 12, 2013


I will be 66 in October and have been a loyal citizen of this country from when I could discern what loyalty meant. But I never knew that in the state of my residence, Selangor that there are words that cannot be uttered by non-Muslims either orally or in writing, including "Allah", "firman Allah" (God’s decree), "solat" (daily prayers), "Rasul", "mubaligh" (missionary), "mufti" (cleric), "iman" (faith), "Kaabah", "Qiblat" (the direction in which Muslims pray), and "Haji". 
Non-Muslims found guilty of using the words may be fined up to RM3,000 or jailed for up to two years, or both.

Okay so the verdict's still out on the use of Allah by Christians etc. but leaving that word aside what's wrong with the other words? So if I want to refer to a Muslim cleric what word do I use? I am getting really confused la. And I am not being disrespectful to Islam or Muslims okay? But can someone answer my question? Please?


You know I also interrogate my kids. All the time. If they do their homework. If they have been naughty. Stuff like that. So no problem my mata-mata talk to your kids in school.

  How do you know that the Inspector-General of Police doesn't know what we mean and doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about? It's all explained here in this Malay Mail report

Don't worry. I am going to boost all of you. Boost, boost, boost. Apetu boost? 
Errrr......nanti dulu. Sabar la...
When I read this headline in The Malay Mail I felt really angry. Not for the racist reasons some of you might think.

PM to announce steps to help Malays, says report

The prime minister will soon announce measures to boost the economic role of Malays.

Hiyoh!!! The Barisan Nasional governments have been saying the same thing since 1969 la.
If our Malay brethren are still in the shit-house maybe it is time for some new ideas. From a new government? I mean if you've been having measures to "boost" the economic role of the Malays for 44 years why have they not worked?
Aiyoh! Mr. Najib tell us some other story la. Can ah?
One Malay doesn't think much of all these BOOSTS. (Article copied from The Malay Mail online)
Helping the Malays? Not again! — Zaid Ibrahim
SEPT 12 — I believe the Government is in the midst of launching new, specific plans to “help the Malays”.
Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Datuk Seri Abdul Wahid Omar has been tasked with coming out with fresh initiatives to make the presence of the Malays in commercial and private sectors more prominent. This is to address concerns such as the lack of Malay executives in senior positions.
There have already been many Government initiatives to help the Malays, ranging from giving them the opportunity to acquire 30 per cent equity in Chinese listed firms to letting them enjoying a 5 per cent discount on property purchases.
Business licences need to be registered with the Ministry of Finance and must have majority Bumiputera ownership. In higher education, policies are in place for easier admission by way of matriculation examinations and reserved places. In fact, I think the Government has tried almost everything in the last 40 years under the Malay preference policy. Malays have never had it so good.
I can understand the PM’s position in light of the upcoming Umno General Assembly. An Umno leader is a Malay hero and he must therefore show what he can do for the Malays. I wish the PM success, although helping the Malays must be tough, for several reasons.

For the party, this means helping Umno Malays first so they can then help other Malays in what is known as the trickledown effect. The problem with this theory is that it assumes Umno businessmen will pass down opportunities to other Malays, which is largely not the case. Those who do pass these opportunities along help other Umno members rather than ordinary Malays.
The second problem with this “helping the Malays” programme is timing.  Everyone in politics wants to show the people instant results of their actions or initiatives. The Malays themselves have been fed this idea of instant results and are not willing to accept long-term solutions to their problems.
Unfortunately, long-term change is exactly what’s needed to help the Malays as it involves developing new educational and cultural values. Becoming critical thinkers, honing their English language skills, learning to cope with the demands of the modern workplace—none of this can be done overnight.
The third problem is that the Malays prefer easy handouts like BR1M payments, commissions, diesel subsidies or contracts they can convert quickly to cash.  That’s why they love Approved Permits because they can then ask the Chinese to operate the showrooms and sell the cars.
Who can blame them? They have cashed out their entitlements this way all these years, all while being fully endorsed and supported by the Malay leadership. You cannot hope to change this culture unless you are prepared to be an unpopular Malay/ Umno leader.
Whatever new initiatives the PM’s office will come out with, I doubt they will be helpful to the majority of the Malays or even to the country. I have said this before and I will say it again: the real help the Malays need is for the Government to tell them that there will be no more special treatment for them. They are not entitled to any just because they are Malays. This is the only medicine that can cure the malaise of the Malays and we need it now.
Maybe, after the General Assembly, we can hope that the PM will come out with real programmes that will help the Malays. They need to be forced to do things: forced to learn English, to compete for places in universities, to compete in the private sector.
They need to stop being crybabies who run to Umno for help every time life treats them harshly.
These initiatives will be frowned upon. Utusan Malaysia will abandon the PM and Umno members from top to bottom will kick and yell, but as the leader the PM must administer the right medicine to his people.
* Zaid Ibrahim is a prominent Malaysian lawyer turned politician and is a former Minister in the Prime Minister's Department in charge of legal affairs and judicial reform.
** This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malay Mail Online.


Some food for thought...


Wednesday, September 04, 2013


So what we've been fearing is finally here. Petrol price has gone up 20 sen. Economists say it is good for the country. Government will save billions in subsidies. I am not an economist. I am an ordinary tax-paying Malaysian who will have to face rising costs of living. Petrol prices go up. GST coming soon. My earnings remain the same. I wonder which politician will the first to tell me to tighten my belt. I wonder where my government will spend the billions that will be 'saved'. The times that they have 'saved' money before I have not benefitted. Have you?


So the price of RON95 petrol has gone up 20sen. 

So Najib says this will save the govenment billions of Ringgit which will be used for infrastructural development.

So kampong folks are not affected because they don't drive cars.

So subsidies cost money and they benefit those who don't need subsidies.

So why don't we say......

Raise the customs and excise duties of vehicles with engine capacities exceeding 2000cc by 2000%

Raise the road tax for vehicles with engine capacities more than 2000cc by 3000%

Excempt all the kampong folks kap cai's from any form of road tax

Then sure the government will earns billions of Ringgit more without having to do anything. Correct or not?

Sorry ah...must be the lunch I just had. I didn't know that pak choy and tomato soup has hallucinogenic effects.


Andrew Sia has some thoughts of the petrol issue as well....

Petrol up by RM1 ?!?! All those who support the 20sen petrol price "beacuse it's GOOD for the country" should LOGICALLY support a RM1 price increase also because it's even BETTER for the country ya?
The last time petrol went up 30sen in 2006, it was kononnya to "improve the public transport system". This was the Teh Tarik column I wrote in the Star then in response.

>>YES! As a patriotic Malaysian, I suggest that the petrol price be raised by RM1 instead of 30 sen. Why?! Because I want our country to become a true Negara Majuuu . . .
Even now, with a mere 30 sen petrol price hike, RM4.4bil of "wasteful subsidies" has been "saved" to overhaul our public transport system. Yup, the next time you take a long distance express bus, the drivers will never again:
* send sms or nod off at the wheel.
* come two hours late.
* tell us, “Aiya aircon rosak-lah . . .”.
* drive 130km/h downhill in the rain.

In short, because we are paying more for petrol, enforcement on Datuk-linked bus licence holders will doubtless improve by breathtaking bounds. No more cockroaches running out from under the seats either!
Within KL, other awesome sights from the RM4.4bil should include:
* never waiting more than 15 minutes for the next bus — just like the cheap and efficient mini buses back in the 1980s and 90s before that Intrakota monopoly took over.
* taxi fares will drop when we do away with the middleman taxi toll collectors, I mean, licence holders — only one permit per driver from now on.
* there will be shady tree-lined pathways for us to cycle or walk on.
* transport planning will improve magically: the most super-jam packed place in the Universe — Megamall on a Sunday — will finally get an LRT stop!

Isn’t that all fantastic Value For Money from a mere 30 sen petrol price hike?
Now, imagine the marvels from a RM1 increase! We can then save RM14.6bil which can be pumped into the public education and health systems.
All the best teachers, now giving private tuition classes, will be recruited at top dollar to replace those school teachers which are inept.
Next, believe it or not, there will be enough scholarships for ALL our top SPM and STPM scorers to acquire the best know-how from the greatest overseas universities.
And when they return home in a few years time, we will have priceless human seed capital to build our high-value-added, IT-powered K-economy. No more need to import all those IT-wallahs from Bangalore, let’s refuel the MSC with 100% Malaysian brain juice instead!

Let me come to public health. Going to government hospitals? No more long queues or second-rate treatment. All that money will be deployed to raise salaries so that the best medical brains remain in public service.
In addition, much more money can go into roads, rural clinics and the Flying Doctor service in Sabah and Sarawak so that no Malaysian will ever need to trek and boat for three days to get medical care.
Why, the RM14.6bil can even be channelled to prevent crime — by paying for private security guards to do daily patrols in housing estates nationwide, thus sparing us the cost of security services and gated communities. Indeed, I believe the police can supervise this subcon scheme very well.
What’s next? Helping the poor? Boosting agriculture? No more dirty tap water?
So. Friends, KL-ites and countrymen. This RM1 petrol price jacking is the Honourable Way forward for Malaysia. What’s NOT to support about it?
Oh . . . you say that it’s the government’s job to do all these things anyway because they collect taxes?
Well, well, well... that’s the "typical subsidy mentality" that’s got to go if we want to progress folks! Once give, you fellas will keep on expecting. When stop giving, then you simply scold "da bladi garmen". Not thankful at all.
It’s about time you ***gers grow up; you think the government is your Father giving out pocket money, is it?
OK, they may be your Father when it comes to telling you what you should or should not think, but when it comes to money, sorry-lah, it’s time for you fellas to Make Sacrifices, Share the Burden and Be Responsible for the country.
The rakyat must Accept Lifestyle Changes. If you have to, then sell the car, ride a motorbike and double your personal accident coverage.

But all in all, Don’t Worry. The price of everything will not go up . . . I mean, should not go up... because our Malaysian businessmen are equally patriotic and they won’t simply simply take advantage by raising prices. Right?
Even if they do, eh, who ask you to go and buy that teh tarik? Make at home-lah.
Wait a minute, maybe that’s precisely what’s going to happen... People will bring home-packed lunches to the office... They won’t go out to shopping complexes so much... And then business owners will renovate their bungalows less...
But ignore all that doomsday talk from egg-head economists: that inflation, less disposable income and decreased consumer spending will hurt our economy.
These academics are wrong. Consumer spending by 24 million Malaysian consumers is too well distributed to stimulate the economy.
It’s better to centralise things in our hands, because the government is always more efficient at spending the RM14.6 billion on stuff that brings the maximum economic multiplier spin-off benefits to the maximum number of people. Take the National Astronaut Programme or fancy decorated roundabouts for instance.
Therefore my friends . . . you see there are no real objections to this modest proposal of a RM1 increase in petrol prices. Instead, a "world of benefits" will flow to our public transport, education, health, security and Everything Else.
So if you’re truly patriotic, if you want Malaysia to become a Negara Maju, you’d be out on the streets tomorrow clamouring for this RM1 petrol price hike.


Shuhaimi Baba - film director and fictional historian

TANDA PUTERA - the continuing debate.

FINAS is clearly headed by people UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT. Read these statements and be convinced. Hee hee hee....

“This is shameful and sad,” said Finas Compulsory Screening Scheme (CSS) chairman Datuk Mustapha Maarof, pointing out that the film production cost was RM4.8 million. (he was referring to the poor boxoffice of Tanda Putera)

“Tanda Putera is a good film but the taste of viewers vary. The film now has to be shown in smaller cinemas because of the poor response."

“Among the reasons cinemas reject local films was because of the poor quality. Hence, it is Finas’s responsibility to help local film distributors get an appropriate date for the film to be screened four times a day”......

That last statement, unless something was lost in translation, is hilarious. Local films are poor quality. So it is FINAS duty to make sure they are shown??????


How do you know that the delay button didn't work on NTV 7's Breakfast Show this morning? When you hear a guest stand-up comic say "How many hours a week do you work? 4? You must be Malay." Hahaha. Nobody's blown a fuse yet which is great. I can't wait for the day when we can return to being able to laugh at and with each other without taking offence.